It can't be easy being a Republican these days.
Gingrich and Osama agree that we are now in World War III. Are Gingrich and Osama really supposed to be on the same page?
Cheney tells Timmy that nothing we've done in Iraq was wrong - he wouldn't change a thing. Isn't he supposed to be on the same side as reality?
Reagan P.R. flack Noonan reports on what the giggling Laura and W. did on the night of 9/11/2001. (It had to do with his need to be well-rested - but they are zany, those two!) [H/T Attaturk] But I thought Noonan was supposed to help their image?
Bush P.R. flack Karen Hughes is outraged that there are "those who try to justify the violence [of 9/11] based on policy differences,[or] long-held grievances..."
Regan P.R. flack Dinesh D'Souza does just that - he blames 9/11 on policy differences; or as his publisher describes it in his new book
He argues that it is not our exercise of freedom that enrages our enemies, but our abuse of that freedom—from the sexual liberty of women to the support of gay marriage, birth control, and no-fault divorce,
If no-fault divorce is really to blame for 9/11, I suppose we should incarcerate one of the following: (Please vote on who you think deserves to hang)
Don't worry about which answer is right; it's a trick question. They are all Mrs. Rudolph Giuliani. The first is Donna Hanover Giuliani, whose marriage to Rudy was her second, and lasted 16 years. Number 2 was only married to Rudy for 14 years - Regina Peruggi Giuilani, who was Rudy's first wife and third cousin. Number 3, of course, is Rudy's third wife, Judi Giuliani, the former Mrs. Bruce Nathan.
Rudy's marital history might seem confusing, but to be a Republican these days you just have to become accustomed things being a little bit jumbled, and at odds with reality.